🧙♂️ The Fellowship Newsletter
Week 3 - Stop being scared of Public Speaking
Hello friend,
Welcome to the third edition of The Fellowship Newsletter.
This week, we cover Public Speaking.
Ever since I was a boy, I have struggled to stand up in front of groups of people and speak confidently. I had a stutter. The doctor said I had so much on my brain that my tongue struggled to keep up. “He’ll grow out of it”.
Well, that was utter rubbish. I didn’t grow out of it. I still have a stutter. It’s not a confidence thing. I can stutter even when I’m perfectly comfortable and happy. In everyday life, I have learned to mask it. It’s so hidden that you’d probably never have known if you hadn’t read this.
Over the last two years working remotely and listening to other people talking in meetings, I realised that most people struggle with filler words. I um and ahhhh, just like everyone else. I’m not unique in that. I differ because I use pauses to prevent me from tripping over my words or stumbling like a scratched CD.
I have been trying to build confidence in this area for years. So, I set myself the goal of actively improving my public speaking by the end of 2023. Nobody would want a meek instructor who stutters, mumbles, and mutters. Building my public speaking knowledge was the first thing I had to do. I set about watching hours of YouTube videos about the subject.
I attended a few sessions at a local public speaking group and gave what the chair said was “The best first speech I have watched”. I can stand up and give a great talk. I’ve been doing it for years. I was a team leader in the military. I’ve been a survival instructor, a circus instructor, and a group leader for a performing arts group. Each time I stand before a group to speak, I die a little inside.
How does public speaking make you feel?
If I wanted to be a good instructor, security practitioner, and leader, I needed to figure this out. I needed to be able to feel confident when delivering a talk. I am confident in 99% of the things I do in life.
I’ve stood my ground when face to face with big wild animals; I’ve been to war, and I’ve performed solo in front of 10,000 people as a fire performer. I’ve also been a bouncer. I can stand my ground and even resolve conflict verbally when faced with aggression from people. I don’t lack confidence unless I’m speaking to groups.
Finding my confidence
During one of the sessions watching TEDx talks, I found one called “How to avoid death By PowerPoint”. It was a Swedish man named David JP Phillips who gave one of the best speeches I had ever heard. It was all about making your PowerPoint slides in a way that added to your presentation, not being the focus of them. I was captivated. I went down the rabbit hole, watching lots of his content.
In March this year, I had the opportunity to attend a free 5 Day public speaking challenge hosted by David. It was an online webinar format where he spoke for an hour each day about how different chemicals in the brain affect how we feel when public speaking. Here is the gist of the five days…
Endorphins
Endorphins are triggered by laughing. Think of a funny story or something that has happened to you that makes you laugh. Watch a short playlist of videos that make your belly laugh. If you feel happier, you’ll deliver your message much better.
Dopamine
The brain works better when it’s full of dopamine. If you give it dopamine, it feeds additional dopamine. You’ll feel less nervous and more relaxed if you can fill your brain with it before a presentation. Motivation gives you dopamine. What is your reason for giving the speech?
Oxytocin
This chemical is the body’s natural method of bonding and controlling stress. You can produce additional oxytocin by looking at family photos, watching sad videos, tearing up, making slow eye movements and feeling empathy, humanity, and care.
Testosterone
Testosterone is raised by winning at sports, anything where you feel powerful, strong, or in danger. Increasing your base volume by 10-20% can give you a 10% boost in testosterone. This additional boost gives you extra confidence in yourself. Stand in a power pose. Roar at the sky. These will all give you a boost.
Serotonin
This is the chemical you feel when you are proud. Look at video testimonials and reviews of your work. Videos of you being badass, videos of you as a presenter and feeling genuinely proud of a friend’s success.
These five chemicals will all enhance your ability as a public speaker. If you struggle with it, set yourself up 5-10 minutes before your meeting to inject the positive chemicals. Watch funny videos, roar at the sky, and speak from the chest.
Now let’s look at the bad one…
Cortisol
You’ll feel pain, fear, and suffering if your system has high cortisol levels. If you don’t control the other 5, the brain resorts to injecting this, and you’ll struggle to perform your best.
5 Tips to beat cortisol.
1. Convert it to dopamine!
2. Oxytocin will beat cortisol.
3. Change how you speak to yourself. You’re not nervous; you’re excited!
4. Re-appraise your pain. Choose your feelings. Don’t let cortisol tell you how you feel.
5. Nail your beginning.
Putting it into practice
There is much more to my public speaking journey over the last six months. I intend to tell it in future Newsletters. Before I close out this one, I want to say that I put all the learning together for a presentation my manager asked me to do. I presented my policy strategy to the 20+ people in our security team.
I’ve been working on my strategy for the last month or two. I am targeting risk scenarios with security policies to close our gaps, changing the language in our messaging to be more positive/respectful while evolving from a rule-based policy culture to a principle-based one.
The presentation was last Wednesday, and I gave the presentation of my life!
I seriously rocked it. I was confident, clear, and eloquent. There were no filler words…
It blew my mind!!!
The CISO said that it was “An excellent presentation”. He thought it was so good that he would present my strategy for principle-based policies to a CISO council in the next few weeks.
My manager said he felt “Energised”, and the Project Manager said she was “Captivated” by my presentation.
I had a little help. Julie Hardesty is a Public Speaking Coach working for Infor. She agreed to be my mentor as part of an internal mentoring program run by the company. Julie helped me find the points of emphasis and found the bits where I could show the real impact of my work. Without her, it would not have been anywhere near as good as it was.
Julie is on LinkedIn and is just starting as a freelance Public Speaking coach. If you’re looking to progress in your career and you have a big presentation coming up, give Julie a DM. She can help you add the magic 🎤🔥. If there is one thing you take from this, let it be that if I can give a superb presentation, you can too.
Until the next adventure!
Stuart Wedge
PolicyWizard